Light Switch Lessons: How the Simple Act of Turning it Off Can Shed Light On It All

One of the most fun aspects of parenting is watching your child relish in the simple things of life.

Today my son discovered light switches.

We spent upwards of ten minutes going from room to room turning the lights on and off (don't tell my husband as he is the electric bill gestapo).

Each successful flip would result in fits of laughter and an accomplished smile that only conquering a new frontier can generate. As I stood there watching his own proverbial light bulb go on, I couldn't help but reflect on the way he has opened up my own eyes to the true light of life.

Before my son came along I was an overachiever. A perfectionist. A do-it-all-or-don't-bother-playing-the-game type of girl.

From pageants to acting and getting married at 24, I went on to compete in fitness competitions and move to three different states. I was working full time while I recorded and promoted an album. I got a book published and found it amazing that I still found a crumpled sliver of time to limp my way through some kind of threadbare prayer life and spotty church attendance.

In truth, I was exhausted. In my mind, I was accomplished.

I remember feeling as if I was running down the dawn. If there were hours left in a day I needed to be somebody. Do something of note. Burn off some calories. Make another salad. Drink another glass of water. Dream about French fires. Indulge in a sweet potato. Dream of sleeping in, but get to work early- again. Write a song. Write a paragraph. Make a dollar. Spend a dollar.

And then as if there was a electric surge that blew a breaker. It went dark.

The world became quiet. I relapsed into a cocoon of hibernation. I found out I was pregnant.

From the moment I saw that positive pregnancy test it was if my heart started beating at an entirely different rate. I noticed sunsets. I took long leisurely naps. I spent time really praying about this huge responsibility. I stopped promoting myself and I started entertaining the idea of what it would like to divide myself.

Being pregnant and being a mom pose two entirely different states of being. One is preparation, the other is segregation. While it may not be popular, I don't believe in super moms. I don't believe you can do it all. You can do a lot- some more than others, but trying to do it all is just an on-ramp to burning out.

In all honesty, I still struggle with turning it off. I still have this gold-medal-or-bust attitude about me- but instead of trying to break Billboards Top 100 I am trying to break my sons habit of throwing his dinner all over the wall. For some women they can balance motherhood and work beautifully. I realized very quickly that I can only whole-heartedly commit myself to one thing at a time. Its the way I am wired.

This was proven to be true as I spent years spinning my wheels in the mire of getting nowhere in a hurry. Like Josh Billings said, Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

That has always been my problem. I have been nothing like postage stamp or a light switch.

Before baby, I would constantly flicker one way or the other making it impossible to see where I was going. But now, I have decided to shut it all down for a time. I am going to stick to one thing. Being a mom. No distractions. No illusions. No pause button or dimmer switch. I am going to attempt to be fully on; all the time. Well, not all the time- everyone needs a date night and that odd weekend away here and there.

My point is this. For a woman who never wanted to slow down, motherhood has forced my hand. The beauty of my newfound on-and-off switch is that I never realized how rewarding it can be to turn off the noise of my own ego and turn on the light of letting go.

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What Nice Girls Can Stand to Learn from NFL's Bad Boy Michael Vick

Yes, my fellow nice girls. You read that right. Believe it or not, I've been thinking about the connection between Michael Vick and the success of nice girls worldwide for a few weeks now. What's the correlation? Well, it has something to do with mountains, money, and morals.

Whether you follow sports or not, the roller-coaster ride that is Michael Vick’s career has been falling and rising since he hit the Atlanta Falcons field early in his career.

The most jolting aspect of his rise to notoriety? Just two years ago he was released from jail on dog-fighting charges, and now he just signed a $100 million dollar 6-year contract with the Philadelphia Eagles- $40 million of which is guaranteed.

So what does this have to do with today’s woman? Well, it poses a question that seems to contradict my methodology for life: do nice girls/guys finish last? While, the concept isn’t new, it is something that seems to radiate throughout the ages- especially in the wake of seemingly corrupt individuals succeeding.

As women in today’s professional climate we have several choices to make on a daily basis. Aside from multitasking, climbing corporate ladders, and somehow carving out some time for ourselves to relax- we are faced with moral and ethical decisions every day. Depending on where you benchmark your success, either dollar signs or peace signs- the nice girl is sometimes left in the stiletto dust of her more outspoken and less ethical counterpart. Does this make her any less successful? And if so, is the finish line the most important destination- or perhaps could the mile markers in-between be the real measures of her success?

Mt. Kilimanjaro may be where we find the answer.

Kilimanjaro is the world’s tallest free-standing mountain at 19,340 feet. There is not one way up this mountain. Like most climbs, there are many different routes depending on what suits your climbing style best. When climbing Kilimanjaro you have 6 different routes to choose from. The Mount Kilimanjaro Climbing Guide describes each like this:

The Marangu Route: the only Kilimanjaro climb route that offers hut accommodation.

The Machame Route: the most popular climbing route up Kilimanjaro.

The Rongai Route: the easiest climb route on Kilimanjaro.

The Shira Route: this Kilimanjaro route catapults you to some serious altitude on the first day.

The Lemosho Route: hands down the most beautiful Kilimanjaro climb route, but expensive.

The Umbwe Route: the most difficult and demanding climb route on Kilimanjaro, and the most spectacular.

I don’t claim to be a climber, but what stands out most to me in these route descriptions is that the easiest and the most popular routes are simply known for being so. The most comfortable route offer huts for rest and and the most uncomfortable offers the highest first-day altitude. The most beautiful and the most spectacular routes are also the most expensive and the most demanding.

My point is this. We all choose which route we take in this life. And whatever route we choose will dictate the quality of our climb.

For some, like Vick, we are choosing to rely on talent to get us to the heights we want to go. Vick wanted to get where he was going quickly despite the poor choices he would ultimately make in his haste to get to the top. The same is true of us as women navigating our careers. When trying to manage our own personal climbs we need to be intentional about the routes we go.

Don’t choose the easiest or the most popular- you will be bored. Don’t choose the most comfortable or quickest way- you will miss out on the precious middle moments. Instead, consider taking those routes that are the hardest to take but offer you the most personal reward at the end.

If there is one thing we can learn from Vick it should be that success shouldn’t be measured in dollar signs- although our culture tells us differently. Personal integrity, moral conviction, and selfless love are such rare and valuable assets to have. And when the sun sets on your final play, you will have so much more than money to show for yourself. You will have immeasurable value.

Talk about a breathtaking view from the top.

Sources:

Business Insider

Mount Kilimanjaro Guide.com

Seattle Nice Girls Listen Up! You're Invited to Girl Power Hour's Anniversary Bash

Nice girls unite! If you live in the Seattle area and want to get connected with the premier women's networking club, Girl Power Hour, then you should grab up a ticket to their 4th anniversary party happening September 28th. These girls do nothing half-way, so bust out your little black dress and hit the red carpet with some of the most down-to-earth, high-powered chicks in the Northwest.

I am looking forward to this event!

PS- This is the one and ONLY GPH event that you can bring your man to- so are you up for a posh date night? Absoultetly.

See you there! GET TICKETS NOW

xoxo,

Megan

Courtesy of Girl Power Hour Blog: How Anti-Assertivenss is the Best Way to Get Promoted

According to a recent article by ABC News, it was reported that, “12 percent of the executive offices of America” are occupied by women. They went on to say that “most of them got there by being tough, forceful and direct.”

However, Elle Magazine recently capitalized on this interesting tidbit of information by highlighting an unusual, yet equally effective anti-assertiveness training program called “Bully Broads”, whose goal is to help highly qualified women get to the top rung by being kind instead of bristly.

Have you hit a plateau in your career? For some of us being the tough girl has worked out thus far, however when it comes to managing a core group of employees or gaining that corner office, we’re hitting a wall. It could be because we need a lesson in anti-assertiveness. However, you may be thinking that seems counter-intuitive, especially when you’ve gotten so far being the feared female in the room.

The truth is that when it comes to getting that coveted executive position, playing hard ball may cause the higher-ups, as well as associates, to fear you instead of revere you.This can get in the way of any further promotion. So how do prove that you can handle more work with grace as well as gall? To boost productivity it has been shown that encouraging one to do better work instead of demeaning co-workers for lackluster performance is the most effective way to increase revenue and in-office camaraderie.

What is known as The Hawthorne Effect, simply states that “productivity gain occurred because the workers were impacted by the motivational effect of the interest being shown in them.”

Human nature remains the same, showing interest in someone motivates them. Negative interest doesn’t count. Bully Broads founder, Jean Hollands has many excellent tips on how to reposition your strong personality to accommodate for all types of employees putting you right where you want to be: in the CEO’s highest graces.

She suggests many steps in the work place, but a few that seem to be the easiest to apply?

1. Talking slowly so other people can listen and respond.
2. Give feedback to others in a constructive way.
3. Walking slowly so people don’t feel overwhelmed or intimidated.
4. Cry at work. (She claims it shows humanity as well as passion)
5. Smile often.
6. Talk softer when reprimanding.
7. Use self-deprecation to appear relate-able.

Whether you feel like you are ready to go to the next level but are being held back by your inability to play nice with others or are simply wanting to be more kind to people to rack up Karma points, Hollands anti-assertiveness advice is practical, useful knowledge that all women should take into consideration.

Besides, how does that saying go? Sometimes the hard thing and the right thing are the same? Looks like being nice may pay big dividends after all.

Nice Girls 60-Day Challenge, Day 46: Embrace Your "Seasons"

Nice Girls 60-Day Challenge Day 46: Embrace Your "Seasons"

All of us go through different seasons in life. The most graceful way to handle each of these is to embrace where you find yourself no matter the circumstances. Some of us are in hard seasons, joyful seasons, boring seasons, and exhausted seasons. All of these serve a purpose in developing who we will become as mature and kind women.

I can tell you first hand how frustrated I can get with the mundane, I find that my season in life is more Groundhog Day then anything else, but as a new mom with a new priority, I can tell you that I will look back on this season will teary eyes, and wish I could play one more game of peek-a-boo with my energetic son.

Don't let the "grass is always greener" mentality steal your current joy. No matter if you are on top of the world or at the end of your rope, try to find the essential learning lessons in this season and utilize those gems of wisdom in the future.

Nice Girls 60-Day Challenge, Day 45: Enjoy Yourself!

Nice Girls 60-Day Challenge, Day 45: Enjoy Yourself!

Summer is here! And there is nothing more fun than hanging out with close friends and family. Whether its at a BBQ in the backyard or boating on a lake, so today's challenge is to take the time to truly enjoy yourself. Far too often nice girls will forget that being nice isn't hard work- nor should it be- but rather an extension of the way you treat yourself.

Today, enjoy being who you are. You are unique, loved and have a specific design to fill a certain void during this time in history. Laugh, love and sip a glass of chilled wine- there is no better time than the present to be truly content in your own skin.